Article by NYTimes. Like many people (most people?), I have always wanted to write bumper stickers. However, I was not willing to invest the money and effort to print my messages, so my ambition languished.

Then, several years ago, I took a new job as a gossip columnist for my local newspaper. In this role, I was to invent fake gossip (as actual gossip might offend the townsfolk). In my column, which is called “Heard by a Bird,” I began to transcribe amusing bumper stickers I saw on Main Street, like this:

Stop Global Whining. 

One day it struck me that I could write my own messages, and pretend they were real – just as Jorge Luis Borges suggested it was superior to write reviews of imaginary books, rather than actually write the books. I would create, if not true bumper stickers, then the rumour of bumper stickers.

By SPARROW and ART CHANTRY
Published: February 13, 2005